Friday, February 25, 2011

Drink the wild air.



Last year for Valentine's day, we decided to build a fort in the middle of our living room, and stay in. We watched moves, ate, and nested in it for 2 nights in a row. This year, we decided that our tradition would remain, and love-day would always be a reason to camp in the middle of our living room.

We slept in our little nest for 3 nights, and only took it down because friends were coming from out of town to stay with us. Of course Michael asked "do you think they want to sleep in the fort?!" :)










All day today, I have felt stressed and stretched thin. My weekend to-do is growing, and for now my list is:


  • Call insurance, sit on hold for ten hours, and find options for pediatricians
  • Go to the post office/mail a package
  • Go to the bank
  • Work 10:00-3:00 tomorrow
  • See family
  • Buy and write out all the thank-you cards for shower gifts
  • Take pictures of new products for March
  • Add new items to the website
  • Completely re-build my site, period
  • Sewing new items (6 headbands, 12 burp cloths, dish towels)
  • Midwife appointment/Ultrasound
  • Work on the nursery
  • Paint picture frames
  • Walk the dog
  • Clean
  • Breathe.



    Are there ever enough hours in the day, friends?

    I have been working feverishly to get so many things done before the weekend hits, so I can relax. But my week days seem just as full, and I'm losing my patience as night hits and things spill over into the next day. I have had no time to relax, do yoga, take a bath, or just enjoy a free minute. Work has been getting harder, and I'm finding myself more and more ready to just sit in the middle of the floor and cry like a huge baby as these last few uncomfortable weeks seem to crawl by.
    Every one keeps telling me to rest, but how can my mind sleep when I know there are things to be done? I am a busy-body by nature, and even when there is nothing left to do, I will find something. Sometimes I really dislike that quality about myself, and wish for more care-free thoughts to push the worrisome ones out of my head.

    Days like today, I am thankful for the beautiful people in my life that weave in and out of these moments like little sweet reminders to just breathe.
    Today when I got to work, I had a gift from a friend waiting for me. A pair of little red shoes for the baby, a little bird shirt for her first few months, a new book to read, with a couple sweet notes inside, like this one.



    Just what I needed today.

    Last week I got a package in the mail from dear Jodi, all the way from Australia. A lovely knit blanket for the little one that I wanted to wrap up in, and a new meditation cd.



    Lucky, lucky me, to have such beautiful people in my life to remind me to stop and take a moment to do the things that really matter.



    I need these reminders so much on weekends like this, where one minute I swear that life will swallow me whole, and the next...I decide that half the things on my to-do list can just go. Because I need a few days to soak in the tub, read my new book, and listen to my cd.



    I know that these are the things I plan to teach this little one, so why should I ask anything less for myself? Sometimes it is easier to teach through the way we live our lives, than through the words we struggle to find. These are the lessons I am already learning through being a Mother. That sometimes, I won't need to say much at all. As long as I am at peace, drinking the wild air around me, baby girl will learn the importance of stealing these sweet moments for herself, one day.



    There is nothing more awakening in your heart than knowing that a little girl will be watching you, waiting to learn her lessons about life. And through my journey into Motherhood, where I should be assuming my role as her teacher, I can't help but feel like she will be teaching me so much more than I could ever know about myself.

  • Tuesday, February 22, 2011

    Ready or Not.




    For every time I thought of this baby girl as just an idea down the road, or a distant daydream, this weekend she became very real to me. We had an appointment with our midwife and the reality sank in that she could even be here as early as 2 weeks away. It has been sending me into a panicked rush to finish her room, and do all my gardening, Spring cleaning, and organizing before she is here and my life changes forever.
    Lately, I feel a tight grasp of panic and stress in my stretched-thin minutes. There are never enough hours in the day, and as each one slips by we are one day closer to the first week of April. What will our lives be like? It is only in moments like this one, where I have 30 minutes to eat my breakfast and compose these thoughts, that I realize that whether I like it or not, she is coming. I can't believe I am holding so much fear, excitement, and complete unknown confusion about this tiny little thing that I feel wiggling inside my belly. Are we ever ready for our lives to change that much in one moment?



    My sister had a beautiful shower for baby girl this weekend. I am so thankful for all our friends and family and all the people who already love her and can't wait to meet her. It makes the stress of my own wandering mind hush a bit, to know that nobody else is worrying about all these changes that are coming.
    I came home with a car full of beautiful things that I can't wait for her to see. There is a mountain in my living room, and as soon as I get home from work today, I will busy-beeing putting things away and cleaning, once again.

    We put together her stroller this weekend, bought her mattress and crib bedding, and finally put up her 3 little white shelves we bought in Austin last month. I took all the old frames I've been collecting and had them fitted for glass, added prints I bought off etsy, and found places for them on the empty walls. Every little thing is coming together, and becoming more real by the day.





    Ready or not, we will meet you soon, baby girl.

    Saturday, February 19, 2011

    DIY Pretty White Bottles ...(and promises of Spring)




    You need:


  • a few empty, clean glass bottles
  • spray paint
  • flowers




    We love root beer around here, so there's always a few bottles in the fridge.



    Since I've studied color most of my life (art classes, interior design, photography, and then hair) I know that white does not mean white. There are about a thousand shades of it, and I prefer the ones that are warmer. I picked a shade called "heirloom white," which has a bit of a warm, cream tone to it.

    Spray an even, light coat, and set each bottle aside to dry for a few minutes. I put about 4 coats total on each bottle.



    All done! On one of our long walks last week, I gathered a few branches from trees along the way that were starting to sprout. I love these little promises of Spring, and fill my house with them every year. This branch already bloomed within 2 days of being in the warm indoors.


    ...




    I feel huge, friends. Only 6 weeks to go, and I don't know how I could possible get any bigger. Breathing, walking, bending over, standing on my feet, and doing anything other than sleeping and eating has become quite difficult. I am thankful for this delicious Spring weather, and a chance to ride my bike and walk outdoors, again. It's been nice to stretch my wings and get some fresh air.

    Happy weekend!
  • Tuesday, February 15, 2011

    Snowed In... (my view of the outside)




    In one month, we had a week of sunshine and 70's, laying out in the yard. Two weeks of blizzards, and this week it is back in the 70's. This Oklahoma weather is so unpredictable, but I am always happy for the quick change when life starts to feel stale.
    The two weeks of snow that we had, I got so much done around the house. And even though my motherly instincts told me to stay inside in my warm, cozy house with a cup a tea, the adventurer in me needed a bit of a break from staring at four walls.

    Here are a few photos from our days in the snow.






    I always appreciate Petey (our Honda Element) on snow days. When everyone else is stuck in snow drifts on the side of the road, we're cruising by. He has also saved quite a few stranded motorists in his day, pulling them to safety.



    We've put over 50,000 miles on him, exploring a few states and heading on lots of little road trips over the last 3 years that we've had him.



















    Here are a few photos I snapped on my phone on the day that Michael built an igloo. My husband is a builder of everything. I threw the ball with H and kept him entertained so he wouldn't remember how cold his paws were. In the end, I could barely crawl inside because of my huge belly. We stayed out there in the freezing cold, proud of our igloo until it was almost dark. Only after Michael asked (half-jokingly) "Do you want to sleep out here, tonight?" I really did marry adventure when I said "I do." And no, I didn't sleep in the igloo in the freezing cold, 8 months pregnant.


    ...

    This break away from the internet has been just what I needed. I've been taking pictures, working on the nursery, sending off packages, and working on stock products for the shop. My computer is actually broken at the moment, and I've been in no rush to figure out how to fix it. The moment to breathe without distraction has been wonderful, and I am going to keep up with only getting online for a couple hours a week here and there.
    I can't imagine how busy our new lives will be, come April. But it is a kind of busy that I can not wait to experience.


    A few questions I've been asked, lately:




    What camera/lenses do you use?
    I have probably been asked this question 10,000 times in my life :) Not only that, but it is the very first question on my FAQ page. You can find my response, there.

    What's your skincare routine?
    Not much of one at all, actually! I wash my face at night with a natural soap. Actually I wash everything with it. Michael even washes his hair with it. We buy it in bulk when we visit Austin a couple times a year. This time we came back with 28 bars :) There are tons, and tons of different companies out there that make natural soap. Here is our favorite.
    Other than that, nothing. I eat really well, and that's normally the very first thing I tell people to do if they want to have good skin. You are what you eat. Here is a list of 20 good foods for good skin. Those are all huge staples in my diet, and the best skin care routine you can come up with.
    I use natural exfoliating sponges, and I think that helps a lot, as well.

    Do you use a tripod?
    Yes, and yes. I hardly ever used to use it, but now I wonder how I ever lived without one. Especially for photos around the house.

    Your toe nails are always so white! What do you use on them?
    HA! I got a little laugh out of that one. Thank you! I used to never have naked toes, but over the last 2 years I have just given up on all polish. I really love short, healthy, clean nails. I think it is the best look of all. I just buff them with a regular nail buffer, and that's it. It gives them a smooth surface and shine, with no chipping or maintenance. Not to mention reaching my toes isn't as easy, anymore :)

    Because you are so down to earth, would you ever consider not wearing makeup because it is so bad for your skin?
    I honestly hate make up. My least favorite part of my day is putting it on. I agree that it is terrible for your skin, so I just try to keep it minimal with a loose powder that I dust on. You will never catch me wearing foundation, or anything heavy on my face.
    With that being said, I think all little girls are a piece of their Mothers. Growing up, I would sit on my Mom's bed and watch her paint on all of her beautiful Lancome makeup. I feel like I have adapted a lot of my Mom's theory on style, and how we look. To me, I think it's important (but not the most important thing) to look as beautiful on the outside as we do on the inside. I don't use my makeup as a mask, and just like to accent with it. As much as I'd love to give it up, I just think I look much more polished and put together with it on. But on the weekends nothing touches my face :) Those are free days.

    Where did you get the birds in the nursery? I purchased them at a local boutique. I get asked a lot of questions about where I buy things, and to be honest, I will probably be no help. I hardly ever shop online, and try to just stay around here in my favorite little local stores. And a lot of the things in our house have been here for years.

    What color is the green paint on your walls? It's Ryegrass by Behr. It's the color in our kitchen, and dining room. I love it! It's more yellow during the day, and takes on an olive hint at night. I've used just about every brand of paint, and Behr hasn't been my favorite as far as quality goes, but I love the color. When we move, I think I will try to match this swatch to another brand I like, just to keep the color around.

    Where did your sister get the bird pendant?
    I couldn't tell you, I'm sorry. I would ask her but she bought it years ago, so I know it's long gone. I have had a bird obsession since I was a little girl, so the little bird trinkets in our house could be years and years old.
    Creepy side note: When I was young, I had a fascination with dead things. Birds in particular. I found a dead one at the zoo, and my Mom let me bring it home in a cup to observe and play with for the day before I had to throw it away. Who knew that I would turn out so normal, with only a slight obsession with birds. All early signs pointed to serial killer :)

    Will you be selling your prints?
    I would love to. I have always wanted to, but feel overwhelmed when it comes to decisions about it. I will hopefully find a company soon that I can get my prints done through.

    Friday, February 11, 2011

    Don't worry, about a thing.




    Every day, I sing this song to my little joon.

    One day I hope to teach her, either through sweet music, words, or by example, to take on each day as a new one. A beautiful fresh start and clean slate - life never really seems to be that bad when you know how many second chances you get to make each day count.

    I bought these 3 little wooden birds at a local boutique the minute I saw them. I knew I would hang them in her room where she would wake up to them every day. To the music of a song she heard me sing to her a hundred times while she was still in my belly.



    Today my day went from good, to no-good terrible-awful very quickly. My brain is a scattered mess and I managed to mix up two orders from the shop. On top of it, I went to pick up the totes from the screen printing company, and they were in the wrong colors.
    I allowed about an hour to feel sorry for myself, and then it was time to get over it.
    People make mistakes, and being in a rotten mood the rest of the night isn't really worth the hard work of staying angry. Sometimes we just need to not worry so much, and realize that everything will be okay.

    A couple weeks ago, my Grandma, who speaks about 15 words of English, said to Michael:

    "don't worry, be happy."

    It was probably the cutest thing she has ever said, at the most appropriate time.
    Grandma is such a simple person, almost child-like in her forever preserved state of naivety. I learn so much from her about the true simplicity of life, and our journey through it.

    ...

    Sweet friends, thank you so much for your kind words in my last post. I never know what to say, so I will just say thank you.


    I hope you have a happy weekend, full of no worries and little birds to remind you of new beginnings.







    "Three Little Birds" -From the album B is for Bob, Bob Marley


    Tuesday, February 8, 2011

    Snowed In... (my view from the inside)




    Last week we got a blizzard that shut down every one and thing for a week. I got an extra 3 days off work and we split the time between exploring the snowy drifts up to my hips, and staying in and cozying up in the warmth and peace of a world covered in a blanket of snow. I mostly stayed in - the last couple weeks my body has told me to slow down and start preparing for the little one.
    Now I realize what the phrase "nesting" really is. It wasn't my intuition to sew or cook or arrange nursery furniture. In one week I have emptied every closet and room in this house, vacuumed every corner, and gotten rid of extra stuff that has just been taking up room. After my last post, I decided to take a break from the internet, and got busy with my long to-do's that need to be done before the first week of April.

    A few pictures from our week of being snowed in (my view from the inside).





    This is such a scary, but sweet picture at the same time. At my last ultrasound, it almost took my breath away to see how much babyjoon has gone from a tiny little wiggly worm to a real baby. She stretched and wrapped her fingers around her tiny toes, sucked her thumb, and looked around. There were so many sweet photos to be taken, and in the end when the ultrasound tech printed them off, I ended up with 3 front-view pictures (you never want to see your alien child from the front while they're in the womb) and one of her crotch. This is the least terrifying of them all, and even though it's a bit scary I have stared at it for hours. The background to my phone, and something I look over 15 times a day. Studying her big eyes that will surely be brown, her round cheeks and belly, and her pouty lips. I can't wait to meet her.







    The finished pillows. I decided to stop at two, since there are so many other pillows on the couch that I couldn't get rid of. I bought this green one almost 10 years ago at a thrift store.










    Her quilt is almost done.







    I feel like my love of tea has turned to addiction when I switched to a mug with a handle.






    The last few weeks I've been teaching myself a thing or two about aperture.

    I get lots of questions about photo editing, and I hate to always come off as rude or unhelpful, but I don't do a lot of editing. These three photos were taken with 3 different settings, with no editing afterward, other than resizing.
    I have taken photos every single day since I was 17 years old and got my first camera. That's 11 years invested in a hobby I am passionate about, so it has grown into something I understand, that comes naturally to me. I might take 15 pictures of the exact same thing until I find one I like. The little egg with a sprout was one of 7 photos that I took until I got the lighting and depth of field correct.
    So, friends, if you really have an interest in something, don't look for the easy way out. Not only does it show, but you're not really nurturing a hobby that you want to grow into something creative. Just slow down and take the time to read your camera manuals, and practice, practice, practice. Photoshop doesn't fix everything.


    ...


    Sorry for the quiet, this last week. With my online break, I have been thinking about a lot of things. And even though there is a huge pile of emails stacking up that I need to return, my time away has made me desperate for more of the same. I have these inner battles with television and internet - tv I can do without completely, and have no desire for. The internet has always been my creative outlet. A place to tell stories and post photos of all my favorite little things. But I hate the time it takes up, and a week away has really shown me how many things I can accomplish that are truly important to me.
    Sometimes I am not the best blog friend, and I can't always answer every question or read every blog or make posts on the things you want to hear. As this space grows, so do the number of people that visit here daily. This week we were featured on Dear Baby and Fit Pregnancy, and yesterday there were a little under 12,000 visits (!!!) to this blog.
    And as more and more people come, I have to try harder to remind myself why I have this space - to share a few of the photos I take on a daily basis, (for myself, not the internet) and to hopefully add a bit of light to someone's day. But that has limitations. I do not and will not ever use this blog as a form of income, so I have to limit my time here or it starts to interfere with my daily life and the things I need to be making time for. Cooking dinner, taking the dog for a walk, finishing a sewing project, and getting ready for our little family of 3....there are so many things I can not take time away from. These days I need nothing more than to be still. To take a long bath with no distraction of Facebook or flicker of light other than the candles. To breathe, and focus, and find a place inside myself to prepare for new journeys ahead.
    This space will stay, but I have to spend less time here. I apologize a thousand times that I am a poor blog friend, but life always comes first. I hope that doesn't take away from the fact that coming here to find all your comments is such a sweet part of my day, even if it's only for brief moments here and there.

    So thank you, friends. For the thousands of you that visit here every month, even though I don't give back much at all. It means a lot to me, and keeps me coming back when all my lists are done, and the world has quieted down enough to allow an hour a couple times a week to share a bit of my life with you.


    All my best,
    Aura



    coming next: Snowed In... (my view from the outside)



    Losing Keys - Jack Johnson