Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Dressing the bump (and addressing the changes)




My least favorite thing to do every day is to find something to wear. I am guilty of living in yoga pants, barefoot, when I don't have to go to work.
Years of being an insecure teenage girl have led me to a point of confidence in myself, where I feel comfortable looking like me, and not ten pounds of hair, clothing, and accessories.

Watching my body grow and change adds a whole other difficulty to my morning routine. I'm in that in between where people squint at me and wonder if I'm pregnant, or if I've had too much beer.

Each and every day another pair of my favorite jeans goes out the door, and I'm confined to my less than beautiful maternity jeans. I think this is the most dangerous stage of pregnancy for any woman who has worked hard to take control of her confidence.


I am in my beginning stages of surrendering to Motherhood. In the first trimester I had to let go of my control over my body, and now I'm learning to let go of my ego, vanity, and strong self-awareness. I'm learning that with every week that passes, this becomes less about me, and more about what is growing inside my body. Good-bye size 0's, toned bellies and being able to bend over.
Hello to my new outtie belly button, curves, and growing hips.

Surrendering to the changes that are happening to me physically are going to be the easiest part of this adventure. Every day something new comes up, and some huge internal battle is ultimately lost to the idea of this little baby that is taking me over.
At least I can try to look cute in the process.






87 comments:

Maura said...

I love that top!! So beautiful!

Alivia said...

Aura,
You look absolutely beautiful (I know you're going to get 500 comments that say exactly this...how am I the first?!). I adore your hair; wish mine looked like that!

agapelife said...

Your hair looks gorgeous, I'm going to have to try it myself
and I'd say you're accomplishing looking cute very well!!! Lovely post as usual

Melissa Blake said...

You look stunning!! Great choices!

sarah said...

beautiful.
(and thank you for your honesty, by the way)

Every Little Thing said...

gah i love Anthro but can't stand to pay so much for clothes. i've been meaning to get there though. they do have an amazing clearance room - and every so often they have 1 or 2 clearance children's books that you won't find anywhere else! i love it.

Katy said...

Mission accomplished, you look so so beautiful! Thank you for being so open, honest and vulnerable on the blog. I'm not a fan of when people sugarcoat, not everything is supposed to be perfect! You're doing a great job!

Kate said...

gorgeous.

coleface said...

I know how you feel. That is all I can say about that. You look super cute, you always do.
Did you know that half of my family is from the middle east too?

Studio 13 said...

you are the cutest little pregnant thing EVER!! love that top.. and shoes.. and everything. adorable :)

Kristina Fournier said...

You are definitely taking it a lot more gracefully than I was! Even harder for me was the end when I even grew out of my yoga pants... YOGA PANTS! I had one pair of hideous jeans that I wore on very few occasions, maternity shirts didn't even fit me, and I only fit into one pair of cheap old sandals because my feet were so swollen. I swore I was never going to be back to my "old" self.

And, girl, when I get home I'm definitely going to have to come visit you at the salon so you can do something with my ever boring/flat hair. :)

Kathleen said...

have you looked at your shadow and not recognized it? I remember thinking, "Nope, that's not MY shadow... wait, is it?"
I took a rubber band to all my regular pants and tied it to the button and the button whole, worked pretttty well :]

robyn said...

i love that you're so honest about your journey - so often on blogs, people share only the fun stuff, the positive stuff, and it leaves a false impression.

and i also think that you'll get into your pregnancy groove and rock those maternity jeans eventually! i hear you can buy skinny jeans that have the maternity belly-pouch in them, so maybe that's an option? not that i know where to get them!

and also, have you heard of Bella Bands? they let you wear your jeans unbottoned and un-zipped, and cover the whole area like a tank top would - maybe you can get a few weeks' extra wear out of some of your jeans?

Brown Girl said...

Wonderful way to look at it, you look beautiful. Then and now!

Sini said...

You look amazing, like always. I'm jealous of that hair, really. I wish mine would stay like that, but it's too slippery.

Hollie said...

my previous comment wondering why you're so cute, would also apply to this. I used a hairtie on my old jeans too. It worked for awhile!

vintage girl at heart said...

you are stunning..earth mama..

Monica said...

You look adorable, as always!

Have you heard of the Belly Band that they sell at Target? From what I understand it enables you to still wear your favorite jeans (up to a certain point, of course) with your ever-expanding belly, by just expanding your jeans along with it.

Julie-Inspired said...

I think the outfit suits you perfectly...and your hair looks beautiful. I'm feeling a romantic, victorian look here:)

Julie xo

Mo Pie, Please said...

You are so freaking cute! I love your hair!

Paula said...

You look lovely.. Just lovely!

I had a very hard time accepting my maternity clothes.. I never gave them a permanent home, not even a drawer. I kept them on a trunk to remind me that they were temporary. I had twins though so never really had that "cute" period of pregnancy and never felt comfortable in my maternity wear.

One think I really regret doing...
After I had my babes I was sure that I would never get back into my pre-pregnancy jeans again so I put them on eBay... I did get back to original size, granted it took awhile and I certainly don't have the same shape I once did, but I still kick myself over that one!

Nicki said...

I felt the same - first trimester you loose control over the body, then you get nervous about the size, but then after I got really proud of my size. And now she wants to kiss me all the time, her newest thing as of yesterday. It's so worth it.

angelarenai said...

That top is adorable! I love this new maternity fashion blogger you have become! :)

Kris said...

Love that hair!!

amber said...

you look gorgeous! that shirt is beautiful.

Jenn from Much to My Delight said...

Honey, you look more than simply cute. Radiant is more like it. You should look into pregnancy modeling, stat.

Jasmine Iris said...

you are gorgeous! you will make a wonderful and beautiful mother.

xo

Anonymous said...

You are gorgeous! Do you have an email address?

Octohawk said...

Haven't been through this, but I can try to understand and sympathize with how your self-perception is changing. That said, I just feel you should know you look great.

accidentally, kle said...

It amazes me how it affects people so differently. I've never been as comfortable as I am since I got pregnant and my body started changing into this shape I've never been before. For the first time ever, I can look myself in the mirror and not cringe. It's incredible.

Also, I've found maternity jeans to be the most amazing and comfortable item of clothing ever encountered haha

You're looking lovely though, no matter how you may be feeling about it :)

Anna said...

You look beautiful. And I love the way you did your hair.

Tasha said...

You are amazingly beautiful!!! Yes, you look very cute, and SOOOO stylish! I have had two little boys, and went from a 0 to a HUGE, so I know how it goes. With my first, I was not interested in looking cute. I cut my hair off, after it went down to my butt for over 10 years, and started wearing men's clothes and sweats. I even started stealing my husband's undies. Nothing like pregnancy to bring out my inner gender-bender, I guess. Enjoy the journey, because it goes so fast once its over. If you breastfeed, you'll be back to your 0 jeans in no time. Don't worry about your confidence- you carry yourself with such grace, and your beauty just radiates!!!! Your words and pictures always inspire me!!!

bex said...

well you are absolutely gorgeous pregnant and all!
I have no clue what its like to be pregnant but the way you are able to put to words what you're going through each phase gives me a sense of what to expect one day ;).
be blessed on this amazing journey

bex

Nicole* said...

i love how you did your hair! the braid is a nice touch :)

Linka said...

You look amazing!! I love your hair!

Jacki said...

love your style!

natasha said...

I know that I am just echoing everybody else's sentiments here and not adding anything new, but you honestly look so gorgeous! And I LOVE your hair :)

jodi said...

oh darling it's hard dressing a bump, I know. but as every one else has said, you do look so glowingly beautiful. are the jeans comfy?

x

Lady Jennie said...

I could never have guessed you were an insecure teenager - you seem so together.

As cliché as it sounds, I have never felt more beautiful than when pregnant (especially around the 5th month when the throwing up was down to once a day until about 2 weeks before I gave birth).

I miss that I will probably not get pregnant again and sometimes hope that a little accident might happen. But three little beauties already and in my early forties ... you get the picture.

Do enjoy. Life just whizzes by. And yes you are radiant. Yes maternity pants are nothing short of impossible.

cegledj said...

I'm sure someone already said it but buy one of those belly bands at target, just make sure and get like a medium bc if they're too tight they're horrible!

I'm almost six months along (eek) and I'm still in my pre-pregnancy pants because of these things! You look a lot like how I'm carrying - all belly - and I just couldn't do the maternity pants, it's like they think your butt just explodes because you get pregnant! Best 15 bucks I spent yet, plus they just look like a cami if they happen to stick out instead of those ugly maternity panels.

Annie Kennedy said...

That is a beautiful, beautiful outfit - and you look gorgeous! I LOVE your hair :) :) :)

Natalie said...

what a cute outfit..and i love your hairdo. I'm really enjoying your blog!

Melissa said...

Hey Aura!

I love this post! I love the picture you took on the beach and wrote "happy" in the sand. I wanted to ask permission if I could print a 4x6 off & hang it on my wall in my living room. If not, I'm totally cool with that as well! =) Thanks so much for your time!

juliana said...

Yes, very beautiful. I understand though ... I went through this same struggle after years of having gained confidence in my appearance. It's a beautiful struggle though, one that leads to a more intense self-knowledge.

xoxoxo

juliana

curiousjessica said...

Aura, you look gorgeous! Where did you get your shirtdress, I love it!

Nadia @ www.lavidaaloha.blogspot.com said...

I think you look great! And if you want cute maternity jeans, try the Lucky brand. They only sell them on-line and they're pricey, but totally worth it! I still wear mine and no one can tell they're maternity (my son is 20 months old). Aloha!

Notes from Holly St. said...

That in between stage is tough. Soon you will be obviously showing and feeling more confident because everyone will know you're pregnant and not just a little chubby. I miss my pre-pregnancy size 0 jeans too :( but I'm looking forward to my little one arriving and fitting back into them in no time. Just keep your eye on the prize. Your outfit is adorable. I hate maternity clothes so I just buy looser fitting regular clothes and it works like a charm...and it's much more stylish!

NCavillones said...

if you are handy with a needle and thread, you can convert your jeans! check out this tutorial. also, a lot of brands are now offering maternity styles, like 7forallmankind, etc.
you are a beautiful mama!

kelly ann said...

you look radiant! i love your peace tote.

lurve you said...

your hair! it's fantastic.

Anonymous said...

aura today is 11/11. are you going to make wishes all day? do you wish out loud or silently? and do you write them down too? how many wishes will you make today.?

Anonymous said...

and by the way you will always be beautiful. the baby just makes you glow. i hope he/she looks just like you : )

Lady Day said...

Surrender to the whole experience. To letting go, to the curves, to the cravings, to the pile-on of emotions. Embrace the woman you are becoming through this season of your life and take time to just sit and smile for all that is taking place right now.

You look absolutely beautiful by the way and I'm loving all that you share here.

Happy Day. Vanni

lasninastextiles.com said...

So pretty!

Anonymous said...

You look darling!!

I never thought of pregnancy affecting a woman like that. Thank you for being so honest.

mel said...

Hello Aura,

I just stumbled upon your blog yesterday and I love it. Your opinion on food is truly inspiring and I'm listening to the according playlist at the office right now (it's a perfect mix of songs I love and songs I didn't know yet!).

All the best from Austria,
Mel

PS: you look stunning in that last post. seriously.

jennifer said...

you mention many of the reasons that pregnancy is 9 month boot camp for the task of parenting.

The DG Family said...

Picture perfect! Love it all. I'm a young mother to four kids and understand completely. Lucky for you, there are cute non maternity clothes out there that you can probably wear just the same. It's an amazing process watching your body change and carrying a sweet miracle inside.

Becka Robinson said...

Love that shirt! Anthropologie is my favorite. :)

Anonymous said...

You are an adorable pregnantee! Every ounce of heartburn, nausea and little (or big) stretchmark will be so worth it in the end! Trust me!
-AZ Mother of 4

RoAmyLive said...

beautiful shots!

megferdaze said...

you look beautiful girl. good for you for being able to breath easy and support the changes your body is going through. im just passing on through but wanted to leave you some support.
meg

BethanySusan said...

sooo cute! love your hair and the top is a beaut :)

Johanna said...

Oh so pretty.

Jessica said...

you look absolutely stunning!
Not only are the outfit and hair adorable, just you, you are GLOWING! I remember when I was pregnant and people would tell me, "you just glow!" and in my uncomfortable winded state I was snap back sarcastically (sometimes), "nope, not glowing, just sweating because it takes all my effort just to reach down and put on my shoes!" :D You really do look beautiful!

Whitney Lee said...

You are one of those women who make pregnancy and the pregnant feminine form so beautiful, graceful even. Actually, I found that once I accepted the fact that my body was never going to look exactly the same ever again, I loved my belly. I rubbed it, I talked to it, and toward the latter portion I used it as a tray. I actually missed it once it was gone.

There are actually some great maternity clothes out there (as evidenced by your pictures). As you get bigger it gets even more exciting. I can assure you, you don't look like you had too much beer-you look pregnant. Gorgeously so.

elizabeth said...

Great choice of attire-and so YOU! I can certainly see the inner glow.

What a wonderful time of your life. You are about to undergo the most sweetly intense love affair. You think you fell hard for your husband? Just wait..... : )

Megan said...

You should do more "dressing the bump" posts :)

I have been reading your blog for a few weeks now.. and I adore it!

ella@lifeologia said...

aura, you look stunning with that little belly of yours.
I haven't been in a while and I first have to congratulate you both on your pregnancy!
(I am the one who once commented that you should have kids soon so your grandparents will enjoy them ;)
Back to this post, your accessories, knits, hair and the belly - it's all soo beautiful ;)
xoxo
Ella

Mama Cas said...

For the record, it's possible to be beautiful (or cute!) while being pregnant....and I think you've nailed it!

I've been pregnant 4 times. (No, that's not a typo.) In the overall scheme of things, I truly loved being pregnant. The first time was the greatest experience of my life. But by the 4th time around, I hated my clothes...I hated the shape of my body...I felt freakish and swollen...and when I was naked, I hid from my husband. When I came home from the hospital, I immediately rounded up anything that I had worn in the last 4 months and bagged it up for charity.

Rachel said...

You look beautiful Aura! I only hope that one day when Motherhood becomes part of fates plan for me that I will look half as comfortable and stunning!

p.s I love love love your hair in these pics!!!

Stephanie said...

I love the idea of being pregnant and cannot wait to experience it myself, but I also understand that when that actually happens I may feel differently. I love your honesty and courage to say how you actually feel and not what other people think a pregnant woman should be thinking or saying.

I recently, in a effort to stay on my tight budget, have been trying to wear the clothes I already own in different ways. I often get it stuck in my head that "this shirt" should always be worn with "these sweater", you know? So I am trying to mix it up, I am sure you already do this, but thought I would share anyway. :)

Joanna Goddard said...

you look STUNNING.

Aura said...

Oh goodness. Thank you to every single one of you for your sweet comments, and taking the time to stop by.



Every Little Thing: This top is indeed from the clearance room :) They had it in a handful of colors, and I wish I had bought more. I don't remember how much it was, but it was under $30. The store I bought it from had a giantttt clearance section, it took me 15 minutes just to look through it. I love the store but it's so obnoxiously expensive that I don't even look at their full price items because it's heartbreaking!


Cole: No I did not know that! What part of the Middle East?



Kristina: Your comment made me sad and scared me :( I know I've got just a bit of height on you, but not much. And this is exactly what I feel is going to happen to me! Every one keeps telling me how huge I am and keeps asking if there are twins in there. I'm in for a longggg 5 months. And yes, come visit! Your hair is anything but boring, but I'd love to do it.



Kathleen: I was a big shadow watcher/picture taker, so this is definitely different :)



KLE- I agree about a new sense of self confidence. It's so different than anything I've felt about my body before. I don't want to say too much, because in the next few months I have a LOT to say about it, but I finally feel so curvy and womanly for the first time in my life. Pregnancy has been a big growing tool for me.



Thank you sweet, Jodi. These jeans used to be one of my most comfy pairs because they were so baggy on me. They're not quite as comfortable anymore :)



Jennie- I agree, and I'm finally starting to feel the same way. I hope you get one more little surprise!



Melissa- If you'd like to leave me your email address, I can send you the original copy of that photo so it won't be pixelated! If you just print the one off my blog, it will be blurry. Just leave it in the comments, if you don't mine.




Anonymous- I wish on everything, which is ironic because I don't necessarily believe that just saying your wish out loud wish makes it come true.

"What's meant to be will always be, though I control my destiny."

I wish silently. And sometimes I wish in here, if I am in the mood to write about it. :)



Megan- I was thinking about doing more! I don't really consider myself a fashionable person at all, but I'd like to give advice about clothes that are working for me during this pregnancy.



Ella- As far as having kids so my Grandparents would be able to enjoy them.....we made it!! :) I was so worried about not having one photo of the two of them with my baby, and nothing makes me happier than knowing it is so close.





Thank you every one for the tips on the jeans. I started the hair tie trick around 14 weeks when my bloat we terrible (I'm actually rocking the rigged button hole in these pictures) And bought the belly band at 15 weeks.
But as most of you know, once you put on a pair of maternity jeans, hideous or not, it's hard to go back to your old jeans with the belly bands! It's like putting on sweat pants after a lonnnggg 4 months of too-tight clothing.

Melissa said...

Thanks so much Aura,I'd love that! =) My e-mail is melissakbennett@hotmail.com thank you again! =)

Cate said...

I think pregnancy totally suits you.

I had a Bella Band and it made it so I could wear all my regular jeans through my whole pregnancy. I'd check them out!

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

it's so perfect. I can't begin to imagine all the physical and mental changes a woman who is with child goes through - thank you for being real and down to earth about all this and most of all frank. It's welcoming and refreshing because I knew in my heart of hearts being pregnant was not going to be all happy times and bubbles and rainbows, but at the same time I know deep down all that you go through is totally worth it. oxox

Julia and Yuriy said...

You attitude is amazing.

Jessica said...

You look absolutely beautiful and the baby bump is adorable!

Sydney said...

That top is so incredibly lovely! You might be one one the most beautiful pregnant women I've ever see.

ever.

:)

coleface said...

Lebanon. I thought that you might have known since Ryan sometimes will post about Sito and Jido. My dad I am second generation so I am just a little bit more removed, mostly that I do not speak the language. For some reason people latch on to the fact that I am 1/4 Japanese and never seem to acknowledge that I am 1/2 Lebanese. Sito always talked about the old country like a full time advertisement. Seriously I think they sent her monthly checks to boost tourism or something. Once I started piecing together that you are Iranian I had to say something because you know how it is... We are like sisters now. Well, I don't know if your family is like that but we have a huge collection of Arabs that we adopt as family when they move here. Regardless of country. This is a ridiculous comment, you don't have to approve it since it is just for you anyway. Yay!! I love you little arab mama.

Aura said...

Cole- I am cracking up at your comment! I didn't recognize the names Sito and Jido because my family actually isn't Arabic! Iran of today is mostly an Arabic/Muslim country, but where my family is from, they have more of a Mediterranean background. We're the ancient Persians, and our kind is actually being wiped out (religious persecution) in Iran right now. We speak Farsi, and our religion is Baha'i. Our word for Grandmother is Aubibi :)

But you're right, all Middle Eastern people cling together. It's like we all came over on the boat at the same time, or something :)

coleface said...

Ryan and I were talking about this the other night when he was trying to pay me a compliment by telling me that Persian women and so beautiful. (and they are) but he didn't understand when I was all, you know I am not Persian right??? lol... I am lebajapagerm, oh god. You know my great grandmother was tattooed at birth because of this religion problem. She had a cross tat on her hand to keep her separated from Muslim boys. So strange. Regardless of were you are from or what you speak. I am glad to share some sort of thread with you. I am so proud of that part of my heritage. I wish that is was safer to travel there. I would love to see for myself what it is like. We make yogurt too. Ryan keeps asking me to pick up some starter for our house, and I don't know if I am ready for the commitment.

Aura said...

HA! No, you're not at all Persian. And wow about your great Grandmother. That is pretty serious. Isn't it scary how fanatic some people are about religion? My Dad's parents were actually Muslim, and he said at 14 he decided he would be an atheist and never answer to a God, again. Which is why my sister and I ended up agnostic, and not Muslim or Baha'i (Mom's family).

That's wonderful that you're so proud of that part of your heritage. I'm so very proud of it, too. It's sad to see the blood line disappear as the generations go by, and to know that our culture will just be a story some day. My sister and I are the last full-blood members of our family.
I would love to go to Iran some day, too, but I am terrified.

Maybe someday :)

Rose Umbrella said...

You look great! The top is amazing.
Thanks,
Iris

Roseumbrella.blogspot.com

Khrista said...

I love anthropologie but stick to only buying the home goods as the price tags on the clothing kill me! You look beautiful! I felt the most beautiful when I was pregnant with my son last year!
Your candidness is very refreshing!

amanda said...

Aura - I am just discovering your site...I know I'm a little late to the party. But I am 20 weeks pregnant today and am thrilled to read your candid and touching account of your pregnancy.

It's so nice to hear someone who has had the same mix of feelings I am having - absolute joy over the little one inside of me but frustration about how I am losing control over so many aspects of my life. I know that will only continue!

Anyway, thank you for sharing your experience...I am loving reading along.