Sorry for the quiet, friends. I haven't been online much, but it has really been a nice break. My mind is always so quiet when I am away from the tv and internet.
We're down to the last couple weeks until the baby is here, (any day now!) and I've been so busy trying to get everything finished. In the moments I have left, I am trying to spend my time enjoying this calm before our worlds are turned up-side-down. The weather has been so lovely, and today I spent the afternoon and evening swinging on the porch swing, getting some sunshine on my big, round belly. I am glad we have a privacy fence, because I look pretty ridiculous in my teeny bikinis, these days.
Here are a few things I've been working on around the house, and for the shop.
This weekend I washed and put away all her little clothes, blankets, and socks. Everything is in it's place, and ready to go. We're ready for you, little baby.
These last few weeks I've been keeping busy around the house - ordering stock, scouring flea markets, staging, and photographing some things for the shop. I decided to finally take some of the stress off and pay a designer to build me a website with a full shopping cart, so I can focus on the parts of this business that inspired me to start it in the first place.
This week I've been working on a lookbook - a little peek into bringing the outdoors in and creating natural, simple, and inexpensive looks for your home.
With every bit of this journey into a new career, I am finding exciting new transitions into where I will take the shop. I can't wait to see where this will go over the next few years, and what I can do as this all grows and finally pieces together to build a dream I've held tight for a very long time.
But for the record, starting a new career while you still have your old one, while you're 9 months pregnant, putting together a nursery, and still trying to keep up with your day to day maybe wasn't the best idea :)
Last night I had a minute (or ten) of crying on the kitchen floor. It was my first and hopefully last breakdown of 2011. Sometimes a moment to feel sorry for yourself is all you need as a reminder that things aren't so bad, after all.
Happy Spring, lovelies. After a long, dark Winter, it is finally time for new life.
Last year for Valentine's day, we decided to build a fort in the middle of our living room, and stay in. We watched moves, ate, and nested in it for 2 nights in a row. This year, we decided that our tradition would remain, and love-day would always be a reason to camp in the middle of our living room.
We slept in our little nest for 3 nights, and only took it down because friends were coming from out of town to stay with us. Of course Michael asked "do you think they want to sleep in the fort?!" :)
All day today, I have felt stressed and stretched thin. My weekend to-do is growing, and for now my list is:
Call insurance, sit on hold for ten hours, and find options for pediatricians
Go to the post office/mail a package
Go to the bank
Work 10:00-3:00 tomorrow
See family
Buy and write out all the thank-you cards for shower gifts
Take pictures of new products for March
Add new items to the website
Completely re-build my site, period
Sewing new items (6 headbands, 12 burp cloths, dish towels)
Midwife appointment/Ultrasound
Work on the nursery
Paint picture frames
Walk the dog
Clean
Breathe.
Are there ever enough hours in the day, friends?
I have been working feverishly to get so many things done before the weekend hits, so I can relax. But my week days seem just as full, and I'm losing my patience as night hits and things spill over into the next day. I have had no time to relax, do yoga, take a bath, or just enjoy a free minute. Work has been getting harder, and I'm finding myself more and more ready to just sit in the middle of the floor and cry like a huge baby as these last few uncomfortable weeks seem to crawl by.
Every one keeps telling me to rest, but how can my mind sleep when I know there are things to be done? I am a busy-body by nature, and even when there is nothing left to do, I will find something. Sometimes I really dislike that quality about myself, and wish for more care-free thoughts to push the worrisome ones out of my head.
Days like today, I am thankful for the beautiful people in my life that weave in and out of these moments like little sweet reminders to just breathe.
Today when I got to work, I had a gift from a friend waiting for me. A pair of little red shoes for the baby, a little bird shirt for her first few months, a new book to read, with a couple sweet notes inside, like this one.
Just what I needed today.
Last week I got a package in the mail from dear Jodi, all the way from Australia. A lovely knit blanket for the little one that I wanted to wrap up in, and a new meditation cd.
Lucky, lucky me, to have such beautiful people in my life to remind me to stop and take a moment to do the things that really matter.
I need these reminders so much on weekends like this, where one minute I swear that life will swallow me whole, and the next...I decide that half the things on my to-do list can just go. Because I need a few days to soak in the tub, read my new book, and listen to my cd.
I know that these are the things I plan to teach this little one, so why should I ask anything less for myself? Sometimes it is easier to teach through the way we live our lives, than through the words we struggle to find. These are the lessons I am already learning through being a Mother. That sometimes, I won't need to say much at all. As long as I am at peace, drinking the wild air around me, baby girl will learn the importance of stealing these sweet moments for herself, one day.
There is nothing more awakening in your heart than knowing that a little girl will be watching you, waiting to learn her lessons about life. And through my journey into Motherhood, where I should be assuming my role as her teacher, I can't help but feel like she will be teaching me so much more than I could ever know about myself.
Today I've been working from home. Those are my favorite days, when I get to sit and just be in the moment of the peace and quite. It's such a welcome change from the busy salon, with buzzing stories, loud music, and blow dryers.
Now that I'm in my 7th month, peace & quiet, rest, and the sunshine through the cracked windows are just about my favorite things. When the baby comes, I will go to four days a week at the salon, and spend the extra day working from home. Today I bleached, scrubbed, styled, arranged, and photographed all the new little treasures I found for bark & leaves. It was a little taste of what my extra 3rd day a week off will be like in 2 months, except with a little baby to wear around.
On these days where I am in every moment, not just going through the motions of life, but stopping to feel and smell and hear every sense around me, she is busy-beeing around in my belly, and making her presence known.
Michael's work and school schedule has gotten so busy, that I spend a lot of time with her, just the two of us. At night when he's in class, she makes things a little less lonely, and when I start to feel like I'm staring at these empty walls with my cabin fever growing strong, I can feel little nudges, snuggles & pokes, reminding me that soon enough I will be outside, Spring will be here, and she will be my littlest tag-along.
A few photos from today, working from home:
I've started working on these hair pins. I adore hunting for old treasures, cleaning them up, and photographing them looking their best, but I miss actually creating with my hands, and am going to be doing a bit more sewing in the next couple months.
I found this photo from Summer and it made me miss everything about it. I am just not meant to live in a place where everything dies and the weather turns cold.
& I came across these two photos and fell in love:
My parents, sister and me on one of our cross-country adventures, at the head of the Golden Gate Bridge. I want to stand in this same spot with our little bird, some day.
I love this. My Dad with his cigarette and bare feet, my Mom looking beautiful, Grandma & Grandpa still so young, and my sister, with her head full of dark curls.
I hope you all had a wonderful day.
